Mediation

CO-PARENTING MEDIATION: A Joint Cry for Help

• Meet with parents in one or more sessions to identify specific areas of concern and determine specific remedies.



• Establish objectives with specific consequences if behaviors are not appropriate or if parent does not comply with spirit and intent set forth in parenting provisions in court order.



• Help divorcing parents to design and create parenting plans that meet their individualized circumstances and needs that can be reviewed by respective attorneys and incorporated into the divorce settlement agreement.



• Review with divorcing parents terms and provisions already drafted by attorneys or already agreed upon through court and private mediation, and discuss constructive ways to implement these provisions, considering the practical problems that might arise.



• Cooperate with mental health professionals to provide strategies for handling conflicts arising from divorce and parenting scenarios.



• Work with parents who have been ordered by the court to have supervised visitation or "phased-in" visitation schedules to insure that the parental involvement serves the interests of the children and the family as a whole.



• Consult with children and teenagers who have communication problems with one or both parents as a result of divorce conflict.



• Help families to address scheduling concerns and informal revisions that need to be considered when the court-ordered provisions are silent.



• Handle emergency situations in high conflict divorce and post-divorce scenarios where a problem must be addressed within a few days rather than wait for a contempt action to be filed or a TRO hearing to be set.



• Deal with children and teenagers who refuse to cooperate with the agreed upon visitation plan for "routine" reasons or due to parental alienation.



• Help divorced parents who have special-needs children to agree upon coping strategies and ways to continue to be jointly involved with caregiving and management.



• Help parents of different religious backgrounds work through issues such as the child's "membership", his participation in religious ceremonies, rituals, and activities, and assisting parents in considering and respecting special requirements of particular ethnic and religious cultures to the extent that they impact the shared parenting arrangement.



• Avoid returns to court for modifications and contempt actions that are motivated by vindictiveness, feelings of powerlessness, resentment when a divorced parent remarries, and temporary issues that arise when children are rebellious, having difficulty in school, or are otherwise at risk.



• Assist parents and children when teenagers are expressing a desire to reside with the "other" parent ... dealing with concerns such as, "Does the child really want this or is he being pressured?"; "Is this the best placement for the child, even if he wants to sign an affidavit of election?"; " How do we make the transition in an amicable manner without giving the child the sense that he and not the parents are in control?"; "How can we continue to cooperate with each other when the custodial parent feels hurt and betrayed as a result of the teenager's election to move with the noncustodial parent?"; "What do we do when a child demands to spend more time with the other parent and he is too young to make that decision?"



• Help parents and children to live with the fact that, whether men are from Mars and women are from Venus, divorce agreements have to be workable right here on Earth, like it or not.

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